I hate people...

I think I have a hypochondriac streak. Lately I've been contemplating all sorts of conditions I might have. The thing is, most of them are not physical conditions, but mental.

For a while now I've been pretty convinced that I suffer from ADD. Or Narcolepsy. Or some combination of the two, which is entirely possible because they are related. Narcolepsy medication is the same as ADD medication. I think I have both.

I've gone through phases where I've been touched by anxiety issues. I have mild panic attacks, shortness of breath, tightness in the chest, etc. I can usually talk myself through them and they go away almost as quickly as they appeared. This might go on for a couple of weeks, then life situations change and there are fewer panic-inducing moments.

But lately, I have a new theory. I think I may suffer from some sort of social anxiety disorder. Because sometimes I really hate people. I have expectations for normal person-to-person interactions and when those expectations aren't met, it REALLY bothers me. I also have a heightened sense of justice; when people treat me (or others) unfairly, I get super-annoyed. I'm not sure what causes this...maybe it's an over-abundance of Diet Coke in my life. Or the rain. But whatever it is, I'm starting to wonder if they make medication for it.

Because most of the time, I find that the more people I meet, the more I like myself. That's no way to live life. And it really gets in the way at work, where my entire job is based on relating to the public and interacting with people. So far I just deal by taking it out on my poor computer (banging on the keys, yelling at it) but that's not really fair.

Is it really so ridiculous to expect people to be helpful and courteous? I mean, it's part of the Boy Scout pledge and if 12-year-old boys can manage, can't the rest of us?